Category / Relationships

by Coach Wendy

What Jennifer Learned When She Burned Out

It was the summer of 2023, and Jennifer was a nervous wreck. Her mother’s health had been deteriorating for years, but she stubbornly refused to take it seriously. Jennifer would constantly nag her to see a doctor, eat better, and take care of herself, but her mother would just brush her off.

Watching her mother’s health decline was taking a massive toll on Jennifer’s own mental and emotional well-being. She was constantly worried, anxious, and stressed, trying to find ways to get her mother to take better care of herself. It felt like Jennifer was fighting a losing battle, and the weight of it all was crushing her.

As her daughter, Jennifer felt a deep sense of responsibility to help her mother, but she wasn’t making it easy. Her mother would get defensive whenever Jennifer brought it up, and it often led to arguments and strained their relationship. Jennifer felt powerless, frustrated, and resentful that her mother wasn’t taking her health more seriously. The harsh reality hit her: “If you don’t deal with your mother, your mother will deal with you.”

It wasn’t until Jennifer experienced burnout that she realized she needed to take a different approach. She had to learn to let go of the control and focus on her own well-being first. Jennifer sought out help, which lead her to me. Through my coaching, Jennifer was able to develop coping strategies and set healthier boundaries with her mother.

Jennifer also realized that she couldn’t force her mother to change; her mother had to make that decision for herself. So, instead of nagging and lecturing, Jennifer started having open and honest conversations with her. She expressed her concerns, and also detached herself from the outcome.

Gradually, Jennifer noticed that she wasn’t ruminating about her mother and the bad decisions she was making.

Can you see the difference it may make for you to take care of yourself first? Can you see how your life would be different if you were to seek out the support you need, set boundaries, and have open and empathetic conversations? You can’t control their actions, but you can control how you respond to them.

Share this to someone who needs to hear this today.

In love & light,

P.S. Are you ready to release the guilt? Click here to download your FREE Download of Journaling Prompts for Peace of Mind

by Coach Wendy

A Man On The Inside Gets It All Right

#AManOnTheInside

Watching this show through the lens of a daughter whose mother has been in a care setting for 13 plus years, I can see that the writers of A Man On the Inside have done their homework.

✔️ Daughter grappling with her strained relationship with her dad and coping with her mother’s death oh and trying to balance work, a husband and three children.

✔️ The ever evolving dichotomy of the parent/child and child/parent dynamic.

✔️ Children not being there enough because they are busy – however you see yourself in this. I noticed myself a few times here, to be honest.

✔️ Gossip spreads faster in a ‘community’ than anywhere else in the world.

When your parent moves into a ‘community’ it brings up a LOT of emotions – not just for them. It brings up a LOT of emotions for you, too.

✔️ The feeling of needing to care for everyone else before caring for yourself.

✔️ Caring for your parent, for your children, working full time and still having time for your partner.

✔️ Exhaustion and wresting with the whole crazy part of it all.

✔️ Overwhelm and wishing you had peace of mind.

Having peace of mind is something you can have and your next best step to it is by grabbing your FREE Journal WITH 30 days of Journaling Prompts

Find out in 30 days what your life will look like when you are able to release all guilt, let go of worry, find balance and be present.

In love & light,

by Coach Wendy

Keep an Eye out Next Time You Visit Your Aging Parent

Since the holidays, have you been thinking and wondering about your aging parent?

Did you notice something that is bothering you? Like the unwashed dishes in the sink. Or maybe how your parent is just a little more withdrawn and quiet than they used to be.

There are a few signs to look out for when you visit your aging parent, 10 to be exact, and I’ve attached a PDF that covers them all right here. 10 Signs to Know When It’s Time to Care for Your Aging Parent.

Maybe you aren’t wondering at all and you know for a fact that your parent needs assistance. What do you do next?

It all begins with a conversation. With your parent(s), if possible. And you can also include their friends and neighbors – asking them what they’ve noticed. It can also include your family.

You can start the difficult conversation out by saying something like, “I have something that I’d like to talk with you about …….. can we talk?” If that person says yes, then you can say: 

I feel (say what you are feeling)

I need (say what you need)

Then ask them – what do you need. And get quiet. Listen.

Give it a try and let us know in the comments how it goes!

🩷Coach Wendy

#Caregiver #AgingHealth #Relationships