What if You Weren’t Afraid of Dying?

I recently met a client at a coffee shop who lives locally.

We had a great conversation, although I knew he was holding something back.

He shared that he wasn’t afraid of anything except dying. I asked him why he was afraid of dying.

“Leaving my family and not knowing how they will turn out.” Meaning his children and grandchildren.

I asked him, “What if you weren’t afraid of dying?” Big gasp of air, leans back in his chair, hand over mouth. I can see that my question is shaking some thoughts and feelings loose. And of course, that was my intention.

He says, “That’s a big question.” Yes, it certainly is.  I pushed on – “So what if you weren’t afraid?”

He was quiet for a while and I could see that he was really trying to sort this all out. There was a glimmer in his eye when he said, “I would keep being there for my family. But I would tell them things about me they don’t know. I would share the lessons I’ve learned. I would make sure my grandson knows how to drive.”

That is what it will take for him not to be afraid of dying. It’s not a huge tweak, you see, in the way that he is already living his life.

You notice he didn’t have any grand plans like jumping out of an airplane. He just wants to be there for his family and to pass along as much of his wisdom and the lessons he’s learned as he can.  

Now that he knows this about himself and the way he wants to live his life, he can focus on doing just that. By being focused and purposeful, he is able to make decisions easier. He knows his goal. Now he is living it out.

What if you weren’t afraid of dying? How would you live your life? What would be different than the way you live it now?

❤️Coach Wendy

P.S.  If you are looking for community and connection, I invite you to join my private FB group Life-On Purpose. This is a community of individuals who are seeking to live their lives authentically and purposefully.

What If You Stopped Pretending That Everything Was Okay?

You have a routine and you do the same thing day in and day out.  Lately, though, something is different.  You have begun to look at your life, your routine and have noticed that it is no longer what you want.

You’ve begun to think – I would rather be doing something else.  I want to make an impact in this world.  I want to create.  I want to be living differently.   

You have no idea where to begin.  You have no idea what you want.  You have no idea who you are.   Change begins right here.  When you begin to see things differently.  When you begin to answer the question, “how are you,” honestly.  When you answer the question honestly to yourself first.

When you see a friend and they ask, “How are you?”, do you just smile and say, “Fine, and you?”

What if you stopped pretending that everything was okay?   What if you said what’s on your mind?

I’m ready for a change.  I’m not the same person I was.  I want to be happier.

When you do that, you connect with another person.  Possibly someone that can offer you some insight.  When you ask for help, you connect with community.  When you connect with community you begin to see things differently, to think differently and you gain traction and then you gain momentum. When you smile and say, “I’m fine,” when you really aren’t, you just stay stuck in the same place.

What if you stopped pretending that everything is fine?  What’s possible?

❤️Coach Wendy

P.S.  If you are looking for community and connection, I invite you to join my private FB group Life-On Purpose.  This is a community of individuals who are seeking to live their lives authentically and purposefully.

Overwhelmed and Not Enough or Grateful and Abundant?

Do you ever have so many wonderful ideas and opportunities that you are just so excited and try to do them all at the same time?  Oh I do. I’ve always been a whirlwind.

It’s served me well for many, many years.  I get a lot accomplished.  I also realize that even though I get a lot accomplished, I’m sometimes not quite sure just exactly what I’ve accomplished OR celebrated or enjoyed it.  I’ve jumped from one accomplishment onto the next.

I’m reminding myself to slow down.  Pace myself.  This is not a race. This is a journey to be savored.

I’ve just begun coaching a group of employees.  One of their core challenges is time.  They all say they don’t have enough of it.  And they are fixated on not having enough.  What I have been telling them (which may be too woo-woo) is that what you put your attention on you get more of and it grows.  Therefore, if you are putting your focus on not having enough time, guess what?  You will not have enough time. Instead, when you put your focus on, I have more than enough time, you seem to magically have enough.  But it’s not magic.  It’s the power of gratitude.

Then I found this photo on Facebook:

I’m going to share this with the group today, before our next group coaching call.  It might be hard for some to hear, but that’s where change begins.  When you feel uncomfortable.  That’s when you begin to get curious, ask questions and do something differently.  Like putting your attention toward abundance and gratitude.

What do you want to refocus your mindset around?  What do you want more of?

❤️Coach Wendy

About Coach Wendy

Welcome to my blog!  I’m so excited that you are here!  You see, I stopped blogging over two years ago.  One day, my blog site just went totally wonky and I just gave up on it.  

To tell the truth, it was a good thing that my blog did go wonky because my life and my purpose were wonky.  I needed to figure out who I was and what I wanted.

So I did.  I’ll tell you how I did in a minute but first, let me give you a bit of backstory here:

I was a professional organizer for 12 years.  I loved what I did for many years but toward the end of that time, I started feeling like I wanted to do something different.   I took coach training through Coach Approach for Organizers.  I earned a Certificate in Life & ADHD coaching.  Then I didn’t do anything with it.  I kept working as an organizer.  I kept asking myself, each day, “so what do you want to do?  Organize or coach or a combination of both?”  It was a confusing time.  What made it worse was not making a decision.  So one day, I had a long talk with myself and made a choice.  My heart and my head both told me to coach.  So in November of 2017, I did a hard stop with organizing and jumped into coaching.   

Looking back on how I made my decision, how I got out of the land of indecision, there was a path.  What I discovered when I wrote down the steps, was that I had taken this path many times before in my life when I was at a crossroads.  I realized what I had was a path that could help others in the same situation.  You can download your very own guide here.  Once I took the first step, acknowledging that I needed to change, the remaining 4 steps came very easily.

One of the big ah-ha’s that I had as I was taking this journey was not isolating myself.   So this time, with this blog, I have support.  First, I never would have begun this blog without a very good friend of mine, (you know who you are) who encouraged me to begin blogging again.  I also have a wonderful virtual assistant who will be here to support me.   I get to write from the heart and my VA will post it for me (so I don’t have to pull my hair out with the technical stuff).

In this blog, I’m going to write about living your life on purpose.  That can mean many different things to many people.  To me it means living life mindfully, with adventure and with those around me that I love.

With this blog, I would love to connect with individuals that are at a crossroads in life.  Unsure of who they are, what they want and what their next step will be. If this sounds like you, then you are in the right place. If it doesn’t sound like you, but you know someone who right now is at a crossroads, would you share my blog with them?  I am hoping to pass along some inspiration, hope and if I’m really successful, to be able to start them on their own path.

I’m so happy you are here.  When we are connected to one another, great things happen.

❤️ Coach Wendy